Monday, March 30, 2009

Follow your heart...

On Saturday I went to go and see a psychic in Surry Hills.

One thing that has stayed with me since the reading is what she said to me about my career.

'Follow your heart'.

I think the universe has been giving me a few signs that my heart lies with children. I love them and since having Liam, I love them even more. Even growing up I was surrounded by children and babysat the whole street my parents lived in.

I've decided that once the inlaws leave, I'm going to look into working with them. In what capacity I don't know. She told me I would have my own business, looking after them at home...so maybe family day care?

She also said I would be pregnant in the next two years, maybe sooner and we'd be buying a big house with a big backyard in Perth. Perfect for a play area and lots of kids she said.

I think you are the maker of your own destiny but a little push in the right direction surely can't hurt.

Saturday, March 28, 2009

Its time to go...

I am going to give up alcohol.

We went to a wedding last night and I drank too much. It was a combination of letting off some steam due to our crowded household and it just being available, right in front of me.

Just because it is there Jo doesn't mean you have to drink it!

I don't like myself when I am drunk. I gab on like a dickhead and carry on like one too.

When I was pregnant I didn't touch a drop and really noticed how wonderful I felt physically and mentally.

I think its time to give it up and just save it for special occassions.

Unfortunately while the inlaws are here its wine every night with dinner, but I'm saying no.

I'm too old to feel so shit like I do today. Plus Liam needs a mum who is a bright spark every day.

Sunday, March 22, 2009

S-s-s-sooki

Its my new addiction.

I like everything about Sooki Baby Clothes. They are funky without being too grown up for little babies. They come in cute colours. I love how they nearly always have something on the back of the bottom. And they wash well. I wish I had thought of something like Sooki as a business. What fun it must be designing baby clothes.

Here are two of my latest items I got from Ebay. Now that I know how to use it properly its becoming an addiction. Must stop buying clothes from Ebay. Making constant justifications to my husband that I got one outfit for a whole $11 cheaper than Myer or DJ's is really lost on him.








Thursday, March 19, 2009

The people you run into at the post office


Surry Hills is a funny suburb.

Its full of terrace houses, some funky, some downright awful and a colouful mix of pubs, cafes and shops. It also has an eclectic mix of people. A couple of Saturdays ago on Mardi Gras day, I was getting a pedicure and I lost count of the number of hotpants that went past the salon.

Today I was standing in line at the post office waiting to post off Liam's christening invitations. I could hear the pensioners complaining behind me about how long it takes to pay bills and why everyone had to wait 11 hours to be served.

I looked ahead and saw a girl in front of me. She gave me a quick smile as if to sympathise with the complaining pensioners and I thought 'gee, she looks familiar'. It was Claudia Karvan, my favourite actress.

You know when you see someone famous in real life, you suss them out? Well, Claudia seemed lovely. She smiled at Liam and said he was a gorgeous little fellow and I was insanely jealous that Claudia seems to have gotten her figure back into yoga perfect shape after having two kids, although I would never say that. She's quite a tiny little thing, and very natural.

From what I overhead she was sorting out some passport issue. All I wanted to do was plead with her and see if she could do a third series of Love My Way.

Anyway, I got my stamps and proceeded to lick them. Ho Hum.

'Do you know what the date is today love?' I heard someone ask me.

I looked up to see the biggest fruitbowl I have ever seen on a transvestites head. She had drawn on eyebrows and massive fake boobs.

'Its the 19th today' I smiled.

You gotta love where you live don't you?




Tuesday, March 17, 2009

Luck of the irish to you...

I hope you all had a great St Patricks Day.

Being that I am married into an Irish family it wouldn't be right not to celebrate it. Today we all went down to the Trinity in Surry Hills to have lunch. I didn't feel like drinking today though so I had dessert after my Irish stew. That's it for me now...back on the healthy eating/healthy exercise plan.

Here is a little pic from our lunch complete with silly hats:


Richard has taken his parents out for a drink tonight so I am enjoying the peace and quiet and watching my bubba sleep...goodnight x

Sunday, March 15, 2009

Ahhh water...


Tomorrow, I may be able to go for a swim.

Richard is off work for two weeks and suggested heading down to the beach and we can take turns minding Liam in the shade.

I cannot wait to get in the water. I miss it so much. I intend to swim about 20 laps at the new made over water pool next to the surf club at Coogee beach.

The only problem is I hate my body right now. Its pale, full of stretchmarks and is tired and listless like its owner. I want to shift some weight. I went shopping for new jeans on Friday and just nothing looked right or fitted properly.

So tomorrow I will just try and be one with the water and sun and forget about my body. I'll find joy in feeling weightless in the water and getting my body moving again.

When I am on my own with Liam at home, I hardly find time to eat, but now the inlaws are here I am eating and drinking way too much.

Here is to the end of summer....I'll miss you, but the three of us will be back next year. Hopefully fitter and with a new little surf bug getting ready to enjoy the water.


Saturday, March 14, 2009

A bad start to the day

Oh I am having one of those days.

Last night Richard and I argued again when we got into bed. I know his parents want to spend as much time with Liam as possible, but I'm kinda getting shoved in the corner. Yesterday they wanted him for the whole day and encouraged me to spend a day on my own, so I went and got some stuff done which is hard to do with a baby and went shopping. I wandered around like a nomad for the best part of 5 hours and started to get teary every time I saw a pram or baby. I ended up buying Liam more clothes that he doesn't need.

When I got home I was aching to hold him. I said to Richard when I got into bed that its so hard for me to hand him over, I'm so used to spending every minute with him. So then it all started...me being too controlling of every situation, me not being trusting of his parents etc. I hate arguing with him.

The thing is, my in laws are beautiful people, very sweet, very kind and very generous. But its a big stretch to have them stay for 7 weeks in a small space. They like to fall asleep on the couch after dinner but will wake up when I bring Liam out for his dream feed and watch me feed him and talk loudly to him when all I want to do is feed him and get him back into bed again.

I didn't sleep well last night. I'm learning in marriage that one can't criticise the others parents. It just immediately gets the others back up.

At 5am I woke up because I thought I heard Liam cry. But when I looked in his crib he was fine. Baby dream maybe. I went to go to the toilet and the biggest hugest spider was on the door and scared the hell out of me. I had to wake Richard to get rid of it and then him and his dad spent another 30 minutes trying to coax it out from behind the fridge. Liam started screaming again so I fed him. At this point my back started playing up. During labour, I had an epidural but it took 3 tries to get it in and I've had these attacks of pain where the lower half of my body spasms into pain. By 6.30am I was in tears and screaming in pain, the whole thing felt like labour again so Richard rushed me to the emergency department where I had to get treated. I have to have a MRI scan this week as its the fourth time this has happened but this was the worst by far.

Tonight the four of us are going out to Paddington for dinner and I have my neighbour Jo coming to sit Liam. I really don't want to go out. I just want to snuggle up to Liam and watch him sleep.

I need to sort myself out. I'm not liking the way I am right now and something needs to change because its affecting everyone around me.

Thursday, March 12, 2009

A vintage tee

While reading the Daily Mail UK online the other night, I saw this picture of Myleene Klass wearing this vintage Beatles t-shirt:




The headline of the article reads: 'Myleene wolfs down a large muffin'. I am pretty sure the UK press is trying to insinuate that Myleene is being a bit greedy and not watching the waistline but I like her. She keeps it real. And I LOVE her t-shirt.


So I started to search online for the exact same t-shirt. Ebay has them although only available in the UK and at a cost of 30 pounds. I'm not sure if Richard would be too pleased about that, now that he has found out about my sneaky online shopping addiction.

However these t-shirts were also on Ebay and a whole lot cheaper.





While shopping at Randwick today, Liam and I ventured into a cheap $10 shop and I picked up a vintage looking t-shirt with a floral peace sign with a grey/charcoal background. I'd show you a picture but the camera needs to be charged up.

As most busy mum's will know, your wardrobe changes dramatically with a baby. I now find myself in leggings with dresses over the top or cargo pants and t-shirts. I still like to keep my look interesting (if I even have a look that is), so I thought these t-shirts would keep me looking slightly more yummy mummy. Or just maybe try hard yummy mummy :)

So what do you think? Should I splash out on the tee Myleene has? Or go Blondie? Or pyschedelic Beatle?

Wednesday, March 11, 2009

It is written...


D. It is written

If you have seen Slumdog Millionaire, you will know how poignant this quote/answer is.

Once in a while, I find a movie that really affects me. The last two were Life is Beautiful and Love Actually.

Slumdog is now my most favourite movie of all time.

Richard and I took advantage of our resident babysitters last night and went on a date. I have been hankering him to see this for ages but thought I would need to wait until it was on dvd.

As a parent, its heartbreaking and depressing to watch, particularly in the first half of the film. I felt Richard's arm tense up a lot in the beginning of the movie. Some of it, I couldn't watch and had to bury my head into his shoulder.

If you haven't seen it, its a movie about love and survival and knowledge. But mostly about love.

We walked out of the movie feeling like we had fallen in love and more in love with our little boy. We raced home to see Liam and stood over his cot for the longest time.

Its a beautiful movie and one definitely worth seeing.


Sunday, March 8, 2009

Hola

Sorry I have been a bit incognito.

My parents in law are here and everything has been rather busy.

I kinda have my work cut out for me right now so my posts might be a bit far and few between.

Everything seems to be going ok so far. I am sharing my space and my Monica tendancies are slightly pared down.

I am finding it a bit tough handing Liam over. I am a control freak and like things done in a certain way. They love their grandson so much and being the first, its all very new for everyone.

Yesterday we had a bit of an incident. I was making lunch in the kitchen and we have a balcony off the kitchen where I hang our washing.

My father in law likes to carry Liam around and watch him explore new things. Liam loves looking at the trees swaying in the wind. I looked over at them both on the back balcony and to my horror my father in law had him sitting on the edge of the balcony, holding him. We are on the third floor. I don't know what the hell possessed him to do that and I dropped whatever I was doing and grabbed Liam. It was an instinct thing. I had a few stern words and told him PLEASE NEVER DO THAT AGAIN.

I don't know. I had a chat to my soon to be sister in law (Richard's brothers fiancee). She gets where I am coming from as she has three kids herself and said I did the right thing. I could see that Richard's dad was really sorry. Was I overreacting? I don't think so. I am his mum after all.

I find it so hard handing him over now. I had to go to a hens afternoon/night today and Richard was with his parents. I just think sometimes they forget how hard mum's find it in the beginning.

Tomorrow Rich goes back to work for a week. Richard's parents have encouraged me to head out and have some time to myself. The thing is, Liam is like a body part and I don't like to be separated from him. Today was enough for me.

Tuesday, March 3, 2009

............

I have three brothers and the youngest, Richard, is living in Canada at the moment.

Richard is a one off. He's quite sensitive, open and wears his heart on his sleeve. The other two are pretty tough and can pretty much handle everything. Richard is quite dramatic. In fact, me and him are pretty similar which is why we are so close.

For the past six months my brother has been in a relationship with a girl who is Canadian. They are living together, but no one in our family knows a lot about her. About four weeks ago they had a big fight and my brother moved out. The police were called. She got quite drunk and physical towards him. He called me and was so upset. I told him that these things only get worse and he did the right thing. He didn't deserve what happened, but hopefully he was able to learn from it and move on.

Fast forward to the weekend just gone. He has moved back in with her. We are all in shock. But the worst was still to come. She's pregnant. He won't talk to any of us and will only talk to my dad. The messages are mixed. Apparently she has two kids already that live with their father. Her tubes are tied. He's told us all to go to hell. None of us can work out what is going on with him and the story is all over the place.

I know how hard having a baby can be, even when you have a solid relationship to bring it into. My brother loves kids and is so good with his niece and nephews...but he is still one of those kids that hasn't quite grown up. Every time he called me from Canada he would tell me about the latest practical joke he had played on someone or how much everyone loved his accent. He talked about the easy and free life he had there as a traveller and how he wanted to be like that forever.

I have no idea what is going on and I am so worried about him. He won't return my phone calls, texts or emails. I am thinking I need to hang back a bit and let him come to me. I wish I knew what was going on exactly and how all of this is going to work out.

Because at the end of the day...problems or not, this is a new little life and shouldn't the news of a new little life be greeted with happiness?